Thoughts-a-plenty

I'm sitting in my home, in the aftermath of my dissertation proposal defense - which I passed! {cue hallelujah chorus and wide smiles!} - so happy and so overwhelmed on many accounts. Following are some of the many reasons for why I am both happy and overwhelmed.

*I passed! And lo and behold, it was actually a pleasant experience to be at the defense. MUCH better than my oral comp exams. So relieved, so happy.

*I am so grateful for friends who wished me well, entertained and took care of my kiddos (and husband!), and overall were supportive and encouraging. And parents who have always been supportive - my biggest cheerleaders.

*I am overwhelmed at the disarray of my neglected home that has suffered over the past week. 3 loads of laundry (still stuck in coin-op laundry in the basement - wah woh!), a kitchen that's crowded with dishes and *stuff*, a floor that needs immediate attention from a broom and mop, a bathtub that longs for a scrubbing, and your average daily dose of dusting and tidying up.

*I am MORE than grateful for my husband who gave me a priesthood blessing instead of beta-blockers to calm my troubled nerves. Who fixed me the biggest and best breakfast at 5:30 am so that I could drive to Philly and be at my defense with a full, happy belly. Who made homemade cranberry muffins for my dissertation committee because I burnt the box muffins I intended for them. !!! {Yes, I know, he's amazing.} Who cheered me on, listened to me complain and worry, financed this whole darn thing, hugged and loved and kissed and loved me into a peaceful place.

*I'm so happy that the quantitative, statistical part of my dissertation has been lopped off and I'm in the joyous la-la land of qualitative social science! Away with you, stats! May I never see you again until my post-doc!

*I'm overwhelmed that NOW I get to actually START on my dissertation research. Oh, the documents that I have before me. The piles and piles of documents and reading I have for months to come!

*I am happy for lunch with dear old friends from Philly.

*I am grateful for Rachel... chauffeur and blessed babysitter for my defense. Tu est une amie incroyable. Merci au fondement de mon coeur!

*I am overwhelmed at two weeks without a car while Marc does a rotation in Annapolis, MD.

*I'm excited to spend some time with my dear daughters - no more neglect! Mommy time!

*I'm ecstatic that we get to extend our lease for this happy apartment for yet another year. Despite coin-op laundry, the perks of location, location, location, pool, playground, utilities included, location, location make me happy.

*I am happy that I can see Sophie and Madeleine interacting. I just realized last night that Sophie is already starting to learn from Madeleine. While I was blowing raspberries on their bellies last night, Sophie learned that laughter was the default response after watching Madeleine giggle and giggle after each raspberry.

*I am glad that Madeleine knows how to dress herself, however ridiculous she may end up looking by 10am.

*I am happy that Sophie is smiley and full of laughter. And that her fear is subsiding whenever she hears Madeleine's footsteps approach. She's learning about sisterly love. However intense and smothering it may be.